On Self Loathing

Anyone who knows me knows that I have something of a curio-masochist streak when it comes to movies, so when I wound up extremely bored the other day and went to the theater, only to discover that Public Enemies was sold out, I decided that rather than wait for the next show I would just go and see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Review follows:

Never before has the American studio system dumped more trucks of money into such a gigantic, useless, idiotic and offensive fire. This film took everything that was stupid and puerile about its predecessor and compounded it ten-fold, adding a serious dash of racist caricature into the mix as well. It is an exercise in excess, brought about by too much freedom given to too many incompetent people. It is a blurry noisy mess so bogged down in dog sex, up-skirts, pot brownies and incontinence that you can scarcely try to comprehend it. What's worse is that there isn't even a story in this trainwreck, nor is there even a hint of somebody trying to create one in the entirety of the film's two and a half hour run-time.

Then, just when you think it couldn't get worse... Shia LeBouf's character dies and goes to robot heaven.

Then, just when you think it couldn't get any worse... the robots in robot heaven decide to bring him back to life to torture us some more.

The entire affair is nothing more than utter toss. No wonder it's making coin.

Journey to the Center of the YouTube, Part 4

You stay classy, New Jersey.

Journey to the Center of the YouTube, Part 3

Never before have I been so touched by the courage that resides within the human heart. On YouTube.

Journey to the Center of the YouTube, Part 2

We continue our series with this video of Bjork attempting to explain television. I don't understand it either, really.

Journey to the Center of the YouTube, Part 1

Some YouTube videos for you, both wonderful and disturbing. First up is a video demonstrating Trap Jaw Ants, which bear what Wikipedia refers to as the "fastest moving biting appendages in the animal kingdom." They, as the video demonstrates, use the force of their own biting to fling themselves backwards through the air. I mark them now as a threat to humanity.



Next up is the so-called "Dogway Melody" a frankly disturbing live-action children's vignette from the heart of Prohibition. Man, what did all of that bootleg hooch do to people...